Found this at FauxNews*:
My absolute favorite line in the article is:
“While not incredibly fast, this carnivore [T. rex] was certainly capable of running and would have little difficulty in chasing down footballer David Beckham, for instance,” Manning said.
What a downer. If dinosaurs were alive today, they would wantonly devour our sexiest celebrity athletes. If David Beckham isn’t safe, what is to become of Posh? Her tiny legs couldn’t possibly outrun a dinosaur!
Just imagine… Michael Phelps, swallowed whole by Mosasaurus. Derek Jeter, unsuspectingly carried off by Pteranodon. Danica Patrick, chased down, stomped, and gored by an angry Triceratops. Even poor Maria Sharapova, no matter how hard her serve, could not possibly deter a pack of ravenous Deinonychus intent on tearing her nubile young body asunder.
On the bright side, I’d love to see Michael Vick try to body-slam a Dire Wolf**.
Thank heaven for the K-T Extinction. Our star athletes can go on displaying their toned and oiled bodies on posters promoting sexy, sexy brands without living in fear of random dinosaur attack. What a comfort.
Anyone else surprised that Faux News ran an article about prehistoric animals – with no quotes from ID advocates?
* Who, incidentally, posted the stupidest, most dim-witted looking T-rex picture I’ve ever seen. How hard is it to find a picture of a badass T-rex? I mean come on! He’s Tyrannosaurus fucking rex for crying out loud!
** I realize the Dire Wolf was not, in fact, a dinosaur. It was a Pleistocene mammal. But for the joke to work, it had to be something dog-related. Duhh.